Traveling-#2

What a difference!  So each year Phil takes an Annual Guys Fishing trip to Lake Powell in May.  I usually go to Michigan to stay with family during this time.  Last year my bio mom came here to help me because I had my tonsils out.  This year there was a possible invite on the table for me to go part of the week on the fishing trip. Well, let me describe briefly how that went.  The friend he goes with and his girlfriend met us for dinner to discuss the possibility. The conversation was initiated by the girlfriend who I have only met a couple times.. "The boat ride out there is going to be really rough on you, the houseboat seats are old and uncomfortable, you have to climb a ladder to the roof to sleep on an air mattress every night".  At that point Phil's friend jumped in as said "it's not that we don't want you to go, it's that we care about your safety. He gave me some scenarios of what may happen if the wind was high and the bass boat was rocky on the way out to the houseboat, and that sometimes there isn't enough room in the houseboat to sleep, therefore they have to sleep up top on the air mattresses.  All of that made perfect sense, I appreciated the input.  I am perfectly comfortable sleeping on an air mattress which I always do when we travel. I did not expect to be on the bass boat except for the day we arrive and needing to get out to the houseboat and Phil also had told be it could be uncomfortable for me.  I planned on relaxing on the beach, reading a book or fishing from the houseboat.  I did not know about the ladder to get up/down from the sleeping quarters and that would be difficult for my legs.  By the time we left the dinner I had made up my mind instantly, not because of the thought that I couldn't do it, but because of the company that we keep and the previous experience I had just had on Traveling #1.  I had vowed to not travel again with people that do not understand my condition.  I believe that people that who understand and want you around phrase things like this "it may be a bit uncomfortable, but we will do anything we can to make you comfortable"  "we will see if maybe so and so will let you sleep inside", "we will do whatever we can to make sure you have a good time",  It is all in the tone of voice, wording, body language etc.  So instead, here was my experience...

I have never traveled with a wheelchair, but now,  I have no choice.  Phil took me to the airport at 3:00am for a 5:45 flight to Michigan.  He was leaving for Lake Powell as soon as he dropped me off.  They were allowing him to take me to the gate.  It would put him a bit behind for meeting up with his friend, but he still did it.  He wanted to make sure I got through security (which can be the biggest challenge for me) and to my gate.  I appreciate him for this.  I was the first flight out in the morning. Security wasn't even open until 4:00am, I knew Phil was running behind which internally made me feel guilty, like a burden and all the other things you feel when you become dependent on others when having a disability.  It sucks.  I can tell you that if the shoe was on the other foot, I would do the same.  I cant imagine how frustrating it is.  Anyways, I got through security quickly, and it was so reassuring having Phil there, because he was able to grab my personal belongings that went through the xray machine (purse and carryon)  Usually they have to sit there until I am done with my patdown, which can often take up to an hour.  I slept the entire flight.  I arrived to my bio mom and sister waiting at the curb for me, but willing to come in and get me if they needed too.  The airport attendant actually took me to baggage claim, got my bag and pushed me outside. This truly was such a blessing. They welcomed me with open arms.  Within the first few minutes in the car they asked if I was comfortable, if I needed to stop for anything etc.  The most important thing I can say about the whole trip is they knew ahead of time what my limitations are. They knew I can not go run around.  The plans they made were simple. I had plenty of time to rest, my routine was similar to the routine at home. I did not have time frames, I wasn't rushed, I didn't have to go shop or sightseeing. It was relaxing.  I spent time with family, I felt accepted, I heard compliments (something I don't hear too often).  Its unfortunate, but true, I do not hear many compliments, maybe because I don't get out much?  I heard things that made me feel good about myself.  I guess everyone needs that.  There was a sense of peace and positivity.  I truly appreciated the awareness they have of my abilities. I miss them and wish we could be together every day. I smile a lot when I am with them. 
The trip home also went smoothly. The airport attendants are very helpful with the wheelchair accommodations.  I could not be happier I made the decision I did to go to Michigan. My heart was so fulfilled with happiness, I realized how blessed I am, and how grateful to have such a loving family. 
I think to myself what if I would have made the decision to attend the fishing trip?  I would have once again been filled with negative emotion, it would have probably torn me down, and my soul may not have recovered and replenished as it did.